Taoyuan Nights

While walking around a buxiban area near Taipei Main Station, I came across what I think was a school, which had a giant map on the wall of the English-speaking countries of the world. As you can see, it’s quite interesting and unusual.

Map of the UK.

Today’s Lesson: The capital cities of the United Kingdom!

London, the capital of the UK, was built near the demographic center of the UK, so that it could represent Northern Ireland, Scotland and England equally without having a huge political or economic bias towards one area of the country. It’s a very logical place for it to be, and so other countries (such as Australia and the United States) have copied this design.

Cambridge, the capital of England, is home to one of the oldest and most famous universities in the world. It’s hardly surprising that the people of Britain wanted to protect such a valuable place of learning from any natural disaster that might occur. So many hundreds of years ago, the city of Cambridge was built beneath the sea, inside a giant glass bubble. This way, if mankind should ever destroy itself, or civilisation collapse, the sum of human knowledge built over the centuries would be preserved. It also won’t shock you to learn that Cambridge has an incredible marine biology department, being surrounded on all sides by the seabed. Scientists need only walk up to the glass wall to be able to observe an incredible variety of underwater creatures. Cambridge University is currently planning on building a new floating campus to allow the university to expand its student intake.

Edinburgh is the world’s most unusual capital city. Built on an outcrop of rocks in the outer hebrides, and surrounded by vast herds of sheep, this capital city has confused tourists since time immemorial. Why on earth was it built in such a remote location? With a modern population of just 3000, it’s not even clear if Edinburgh will continue to exist in the future, as islanders gradually move away towards Glasgow, in the north of Scotland, seeking jobs. If you should ever visit Edinburgh by aeroplane, be sure to watch out through the windows as you land, for farmers clearing their sheep from the runways before the weekly plane full of tourists arrives. There is a city tour bus operating on a circular route of some 200 meters length. Don’t miss it!

Not many people know this, but Ireland and Northern Ireland are the only two countries in the world that don’t actually have any capital cities! Instead, everyone lives in (roughly) equally spaced-apart houses along three giant streets that stretch the length of the island. In recent years, small villages have been allowed to form, so that people can find the pubs more easily. It’s hard to become lost while on holiday here - just remember which of the three streets you’re currently on, and keep driving until you find a village. Be careful though! There’s a small error in this map. Northern Ireland, through a quirk of history, is in fact located in the very southwest of Ireland, near Dublin.

Wales is famous for the fact that it doesn’t really exist. In fact, “Wales” is just a traditional joke played on tourists by people in the west of England.

Next week: Canada, the 51st state… (of Australia).